Me, again

Coming Soon. Abangan.   The Future I foresee: Cause of Death for Jesus Ramos:  Death by Self-Asphyxiation. Reaction of His Followers/Disciples:  Hay, Salamat. Baka naman makahinga na kaimng lahat! My Reaction: I felt His pain. I felt it Coming! End of My Suffering. For every death, a new beginning. A beginning we have to usher in. With full gusto. --------- I remember his last cries were "Hanep" and "Puñeta!" Maybe he'll find this in the next life, just not this one. Cries of futility are usually reserved for obscurity.  *At this point, I won't apologize for my English vocabulary. That's because I know as well as the English I have a long way to go. And everyday, with my every post, I try to push my limits even if  they take me to the breaking point . Scratch that. Breakthrough point. Today, not only did I try to break the sound barrier of this household's threshold  by shouting all day, I maintained enough composure to write another blog or two.

"Tama na," ika Niya. "Ayoko Na! sigaw ng titi Niya. Siya ay isang Luslos. Pinanganak na mag-isa sa buhay, pala-asa lamang sa Nanay niyang pobre. Inaasahan naman Siyang mag-hanep buhay. Hindi ito madaling gawain. Dahil ang kinalalabsan Niya ay tagapag-tanggol at tagaangat sa nakararaming tulad Niya na pobre lamang. Wala Siyang iaabot na malasakit o pag-unawa sa mga taong nakaka-angat sa buhay. Isa lamang mataas na pagtingin o admiration. Dahil hindi Siya maka-relate. Siya ay isang Luslos. Nilaglag ng Lipunan. Kinalimutan ng Tadhana.  Ang layunin Niya sa buhay ay pasanin ang mga tulad Niyang nakahandusay sa hirap. Ina-ako Niya ang responsibilidad ng mga taong hindi kayang bayaran ang hinihingi ng pamumuhay sa lipunan (demands of everyday living). Siya ay isang Luslos. Sa Ingles, parang tunog "talo-talo". Ang katotohanan ay hindi nalalayo. Pinanganak Siyang talo o talunan at nais Niyang bawiin ang masamang kapalaran sa mga taong ini-idolo Niya, sa mga taong naka-a...

I ordered a bunch of Macdonalds goodies that I’m having a hard time eating in my own bedroom because The Mang-Uusog is intent on making my meal a very difficult one to digest…as if telling me I should give some to him and his minions. I already gave some Spaghetti I cooked last week to his dilapidated tricycle parked outside our gate. This is my first decent meal of the day at 3:36 in the afternoon. It's a difficulty when the one guarding you insists on a life of poverty, being borne out of poverty himself. I don't mean to discriminate against the poor, just the ones who make themselves felt as such. I just hate putting good? food to waste. I don't really like MacDonalds but the maid insists on cooking me food fit for an Azkal. Sometimes I wish I was permanently out of his gaze. I swear I'll make this a reality soon. It (the entity) doesn't deserve me and I certainly don't deserve a Man of Poverty. Earlier today, after my "non-lunch", I was shouting m...

In today’s world where much malignment and corruption are rampant and you feel as if faced with insurmountable odds in life and sometimes feel like giving up, don’t. Case in point, our Philippine Senate/Government and their unprecedented corruption with their dealings with contractors of the DSWD and God knows what else that keep this Nation from progressing. One can only surmise that the Devil is in the works. Remember that the Devil has no power against God who is all-powerful. The Devil keeps doing things again and again with no increments of improvement or variety. It is as dull as an ATM machine who can only take money from you.  It keeps asking from you to feed its bottomless Ego. Every day, it does the same thing of taunting you, and tempting you to join his group, as if you’ll be getting a fare share of its collections. God has something better for you, for everyone. God does not want His people to suffer needlessly the way the Devil does. If the Devil is one-dimensional in...

Fawning . The word that comes to mind when thinking of the person who guards my every move…whether in the safety of my own bedroom, dining room or living rooms. An idiotic people-pleaser who acts in behalf of an assembly of guests, foreign and local alike; just outside my abode. This is his way of proving to me and himself that I am worthy of the world’s attention, acting like perhaps Phantom to my Prodigy. Whatever good it thinks it is doing; fact is, it is keeping me sick (in pain)...and tired of my existence in my house and in this god-forsaken city. Because anywhere I go or try to rest, it is there, ready to pounce like a gorilla on my back. If people (it caters to) think he is doing me a favor by being my so-called protector and guide, it is in fact doing the opposite of what it's supposed to do. It is a person borne out of poverty, born out of survival and it is doing everything in its deep envy to keep me down, both my spirits and physicality. It will revel in my every pain...