Renaissance Woman
It’s true what they say you get a little rusty when you haven’t picked up a paint brush in awhile and begin to paint again. Normally, painting has to be done everyday if you want favourable results aka results you can actually live with (to develop muscle memory with whatever muscles you’re using while painting, which ultimately aids you in your process.) I’m getting a little stressed with my current watercolor which I haven’t been doing on a regular basis. But maybe just a little. My stress gradually turns into a lesson in patience which I lack when doing art anyway. I remember a high school classmate co-Artist who was not at all impatient like me. How do I know? Here’s an example. When I’m using glue or when I’m working with ink, I don’t usually let the glue dry completely before I make something with the paper and when I’m drawing with ink, I don’t let it dry fully before I erase pencil marks on it which sort of mars the drawing.
Anyway, this classmate of mine was so relaxed and produced very steady, wholesome little pen drawings (for our Theresian zine where we were both resident artists) and I just loved her sweet, soft-spoken personality that goes with the package. Her name is Vina and I remember she was also good at math. In my young impressionable mind, she was like a female Leonardo Da Vina; smart, pretty, a,certified A-1 student (grade 7), kind and sweet although she wasn’t that popular. She was one of the quiet, reserved ones and I think I just missed her mini welcome-back reunion last week. I don’t think I even greeted her via text or messenger.
Going back to me, I think with all the endeavours I actively pursue on a daily basis; from exercising in the gym to tending to the garden and maintaining the neighborhood peace and camaraderie, to taking care of an adult boy with special needs (cerebral palsy), to cooking breakfast for the two of us, to helping in cleaning the house, to taking care of a family business and doing art as a sideline, blogging, deciphering movies, recuperating from a long state of no-social life, recovering from depression, etcetera etcetera (I’m all out of breath just enumerating these things and although they may sound mundane, they’re not insignificant), I think I’m a Renaissance Man or Woman myself and as Bill and Ted would put it, I’m doing “Excellent!” So far.
Thanks to the recent Oscar-winning movie Everything Everywhere All At Once, you get the idea of being a triumphant woman who has split-role personalities as it was demanded of her. And since I’m a recovering depressed person, I don’t think I even consider myself a “woman”. At 58, I still consider myself the youngest child in a brood of five still living in the house of my parents, your regular next-door neighbor, a high school classmate, a girlfriend. Our adopted special-needs nephew considers me like an older sister maybe, and not really “Mama” even if he calls me one. As long as I’m in this current configuration, I’m still an “insignificant” part of this weird family unit. I call it weird because we don’t operate on mutual respect and love. They don’t “see me”. They operate with the constructs of the patriarchal, rat race culture and have myopic visions. Since I don’t really have a 9-5 job, I operate with the free spirit of a sole survivor living in a world so independent from the (mediocre-minded) society they circulate in...sort of like a floating co-processor to keep the general computations working, term loosely used. Think different is how Jobs would put it. Me? I think a lot!
Here’s the sort of liveable watercolor I was doing early on and just finished (I think). As long as I can paint and do art, I think I am a whole person and that’s enough. And even if I don't get paid for it, it's probably more than enough.
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